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Find help online for stress, anxiety and depression
Many things in life can cause us to feel stressed or anxious. From the everyday pressures of paying bills and raising kids to the relatively new phenomenon of trying to avoid a virus during a pandemic, there’s no shortage of things that can cause us to worry.
But with so much on our minds, how do we keep from being crippled by fear of the unknown? Vicki Kamhi, a counselor at Saint Francis Medical Center College of Nursing, says we can recognize and challenge our fear-based thoughts and practice different ways to relax, such as progressive muscle relaxation.
“When we focus on a ‘what if’ thought that something bad could happen, this negative thought triggers the fight-or-flight response in our nervous system,” Vicki said. “While fight-or-flight is an appropriate response during a dangerous situation, our ‘what if’ thoughts, which are based on a perceived danger that is not real, create the same stress response. This can put our bodies on high alert for a sustained period of time, and it’s widely recognized that chronic stress negatively affects our physical and mental health.”
So, how should we handle fearful thoughts?
“You can’t control when a thought happens to pop into your head, but you can control how you respond,” Vicki said. “Thoughts are not necessarily facts. I have a sign in my office that says, ‘99% of the things you worry about never happen,’ and it’s true. The key to reducing our stress and anxiety is to avoid focusing on ‘what if” questions and, instead, focus on being in the present.”
While focusing on the present may seem difficult, anyone can do it through progressive muscle relaxation. Here’s how:
“Progressive muscle relaxation helps you activate your body’s natural relaxation response, which lowers your body’s fight-or-flight response and reduces stress,” Vicki said. “It also keeps you focused on the present, and when you’re in the present, you’re not worrying about what might happen in the future.”
Relief from stress and anxiety aren’t the only benefits of progressive muscle relaxation.
“When we’re relaxed, we are able to regain self-control,” Vicki said. “Our insight and judgment improve, so we’re able to make better decisions. We can pause and take time to respond to others in a kinder, more helpful way. It also makes it easier to be grateful for all the good things in our lives.”
Progressive muscle relaxation can even help you cope with physical pain. By relaxing and being in the present moment, you reduce your stress response and can often relieve some of the pain you’re experiencing.
Progressive muscle relaxation is one of numerous coping tools that fall under the category of mindfulness, which is all about being present in your current situation instead of anxious about the future. Other techniques include:
“Remember, there is a strong connection between your mind and body,” Vicki said. “When you’re feeling stressed or anxious, give yourself permission to take a timeout to do at least one of these exercises. Taking a few minutes can help you avoid getting caught up in mental stories that can steal the peace from your day.”